Cranky Kong Country
by Master Pencil
Summary: Cranky finally decides to show his stuff after years of bragging, but does he still have the magic in him to survive the many headaches of Donkey Kong Island?


**Cranky Kong Country**

**By Master Pencil**

It was a hot, steamy day on Donkey Kong Island, but it was not the humidity that was heating the air. It was Cranky Kong's annoying ranting that perturbed the Kongs like a heat wave; Cranky's hot air that sparked after a nice, cool night that started a little fire by Cranky's blazing thoughts.

"You two are a couple of rookies you know that?!" he complained as the two of them stared at him dully.

"I bet I could explore Donkey Kong Island, knock some heads, and show that mangy K. Rool who's boss!" he continued as he swung his cane around like a sword. Donkey Kong had enough of all this talk.

"Quit it Cranky, you're wasting fire breath," he retorted irritably. He only glared at him annoyingly.

"You keep complaining about how you could get through the whole island in one life, yet all you ever do is sit on that rickety chair complaining the ones that do all the dirty work," he told him. Cranky sunk back in his chair and thought a while.

"Tell you what… I'll just show you!" he exclaimed as he jumped out of the chair and ran off into the jungle. Diddy stared at DK, who only chuckled to himself.

"Well DK, how do you think he'll do?" he asked him. Donkey Kong walked away toward the tree house.

"He won't get past Barrel Cannon Canyon I can you tell you that," he laughed as he looked forward to getting back to his banana hoard. He arrived at the banana hoard to see it empty. "OH NO!"

Cranky Kong ran through the lush jungles, an old excitement finally returning.

"Just wait until Donkey Kong sees me, boy will that be a hoot!" he chuckled. A Gnawty got in his way, and he knocked beside with his cane.

"I still got it in me!" he cheered. He came across a big crate, and smashed it to find Rambi.

"What the, you're not Donkey Kong!" Rambi grunted.

"Shut it Rammy, let's go stomp some beavers and bust some caverns!" he told him as he hopped on his back. They rode off deeper into the jungle, a strange sight as they plowed through unsuspecting kremlings and through a cave to arrive outside with a load of bananas on their backs.

"Where does Donkey Kong keep all these?" he complained as they left the jungle behind.

Now our cranky chimp was exploring the dark mines. "I can't see squat in here!" he complained as he squinted through the spooky caves.

Scary noises were popping up around the old codger and Cranky looked around reproachfully.

"You have come to your grave," the monster hissed ominously.

"Um… one problem with that… you haven't brought the shovel," he said. The beast scowled.

"Mangy old monkey, we will eat you for breakfast!" the monster growled as he jumped out to reveal himself as Rock Kroc.

"It's the afternoon, Croc head!" he complained as he escaped to switch on the lights. The lights caught them off surprise and Cranky hustled away to the surface.

Through the forest came Cranky holding on to a rope for dear life as it carried him through the forest at high speeds.

"What's keeping this thing going?!" he said as he tried to look up at the canopy to try to see some kind of mechanical system working it out. Suddenly, a flock of Neckys came swooping at him. "Just not like the old days," he groaned with pity.

The ice cap was no place for an old ape. He stared around disgusted at the cold environment and was shivering slightly.

"I can't see how Donkey Kong can keep warm up here!" he complained. He spoke too soon, for a blizzard started to appear just seconds later. "Where are my old, rockery chair and nice cup of hot chocolate?" he mumbled.

If the ice cap was bad enough, the factory was evil. He had to survive through nasty, dark environments and flickering lights that blinded him every two seconds. When he came outside grumbling, he stared around the filthy place and saw that the only way that lead forward was through a Green pond that looked polluted.

"I'm not swimming through that," he blurted. But he remembered Donkey Kong telling of how he and Diddy explored the Poison Pond, and he didn't want him to think he chickened out. So Cranky went toward the pond, muttering angrily as he slowly but surely descended into the nasty water.

Cranky Kong was busy constantly fueling up the platform he was on. "Bad gas mileage in this old thing," he muttered.

He would find Rambi to be pretty uncooperative at the green caves; because he freaked out seeing all the spiky wheels zoom all over the place. The pink Krushas hogging the platforms with arrows were no bed of roses either. And Cranky had fun with the dozens of Dumb Drums, since he constantly beat the enemies popping out just to satisfy his frustration.

Finally, all that hard work came to the Gangplank Galleon, and Cranky walked up the ship until King K. Rool crashed onto the deck.

"What, you're not Donkey Kong!" he complained.

"You shouldn't crash the floor like that!" he complained back. K. Rool only shook his head and threw his crown at him, which he dodged to jump on his head. He ran across the ship to send a wave of cannonballs falling on the deck, and Cranky, amazed the giant cannonballs did not bust holes on the deck, dodged them all. Finally, he gave the final blow.

"Yes! I got it done!" he cheered. Credits started to appear, and he pulled off some cool dance moves until the credits stopped and King K. Rool sprang back to life. Frightened, Cranky whacked the crocodile silly with his cane until he tumbled to the floor in a daze, and a giant banana appeared to fall on his back.

"I saved the island, and in only one life!" he cheered as he steered the boat back to the island.

Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong were busy lying around, sad that their bananas were stolen, until the galleon thundered onto the beach. Cranky appeared to them triumphantly.

"How about them bananas Donkey Kong?!" he said. The Kongs only stared at the ship with their mouths hanging open as Cranky returned to his cabin, his vacation complete.


End file.
